Chapters: 1. Why Don't Men Obey God?
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19 BAPTIZED WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT When I awakened the next day, I was starting a life altogether different than that which had gone before. I was no longer following the patterns of men or of the earth, I was simply trusting Jesus. God began to work, and before long the community was stirred up. I didn't know it was going to happen, for I wasn't aware that when you walk with God you stir people; but I began to learn it. As you read about how God worked through each of His servants, you begin to discover that God's men create upheaval in the carnal heart. However, unless you get in the battle yourself, you'll only know this theoretically in your mind. To experience it is a different matter. But I was happy in Jesus. I knew little about the future, but I was looking to God who holds the future in His hand. During November I would return to the parsonage and try to tell Florence what all God was doing with me. "Honey, God is slaying me," I would say. "I am dying--I am dying." She would look at me, trying to understand what I really meant. "Is that right?" she would reply. "Yes," I would tell her, laying my hand over my heart "God is slaying this self-life. I am dying right here inside." Day after day, for weeks and months, He persisted in slaying out of me little hidden things: little ways which weren't pleasing to Him; little ideas that were of the earth and not of Heaven. It was marvelous, but it was a death, believe me. This continued through December of 1941 into the following year, through January, February, and March. 183 The last day of March, 1942, I began a series of
evangelistic services. When I entered the pulpit that night I
felt normal in my body and soul. As soon as I opened the
service, however, God began to take me into an area of the Spirit
which I never knew existed. There is no way to describe how God
was working within me and around me. I have seldom heard of
anyone being in such a place. It was a realm of suffering,
revelation, and crucifixion which words could never embrace. God
was helping me to know: "Son, you have gone about as far as you
can go on your own."
When I arrived home that night, I knew that I must get to my
bed; and that is where God kept me for about two-and-a-half to
three weeks. I was unable to get up; and if I tried, He put me
back in bed.
God talked to me day and night. He talked to me more from
midnight to four in the morning--when my wife, my children, and
the village were asleep--than any other time. I was unable to
sleep because God was revealing to me about Eternity. He was
speaking to me about my mission on earth, about the great need of
the Church. Because of the light I kept on, Florence couldn't
rest and had to sleep in another room.
During the day I would call her to me. "God is calling me!"
I would try to tell her. "He is talking to me. He is telling me
some things."
She would answer, "Yes, I know that God is doing it." Night
after night, day after day, God marvelously worked with me. He
would open the scriptures to my understanding and shine the light
of His truth on various areas of my soul, revealing hidden needs
and carnal ways in my heart, and in the hearts of men, which
grieved Him.
Each evening, Rev. Homer Pumphrey and his wife, Rebecca,
would come over to the house. The devil would try to tell them,
"Don't go back tonight. You are wearing out your welcome. Just
stay at home." But each night, here they would come from their
parsonage home twelve miles away.
184 You talk about being happy to see somebody! I was so
delighted each time they would come, for hardly anyone understood
what I was passing through. I tried to tell a few what God was
doing with me, but I don't know whether anyone comprehended it
much. Even I couldn't grasp all of what God was doing. I was
simply trusting Jesus.
I would tell the Pumphreys, "God is talking to me! God is
doing wonderful things with me!" They would listen and try to
grasp what I was striving in my feeble way to share. They were a
great encouragement to my wife and me at this time.
One night I began to tell them the message God had given me
out of the third chapter of Colossians: "If ye then be risen with
Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on
the right hand of God. Set your affections on things above; not
on things on the earth."
When I first started to share with them, it seemed as if
Homer was three city blocks from me in spiritual distance; yet,
he had visited us night after night and was trying his best to
understand me. Soon, however, the Holy Ghost got hold of his
heart, picked him up in his soul, and set him down real close to
me. I was sharing all that I could tell him as fast as I could
get it out, and he was listening with all the energy that was in
him. "This is wonderful!" he would say. "This is such a
precious message!" The Holy Spirit was giving it and Homer was
feasting. So was I.
It was while I was still on my bed that a precious handmaid
of Jesus felt led of the Lord to pray and fast at the altar of
Shideler Church. She went to the altar at ten-thirty Sunday
morning while my father conducted the service for me. She prayed
all day and on into the night.
She had prayed at that altar twenty-two hours when at eight-
thirty in the morning, while I was still asleep, the power of God
began flowing through me in waves of glory. Before I was fully
awake, wave after wave of the Holy Spirit was moving through my
body! I was being baptized with the
185 Holy Ghost under the glory, the power, and the presence of Jesus!
This continued for nearly four hours.
It was the most wonderful experience of His love--for when
the power would come through me at intervals, it came in wave
after wave of love. There is no way of telling the love which
flowed from my heart to my enemies, to those who hated me, to all
men, following my baptism by the Holy Ghost.
Of course, the love of Jesus flowing from your heart to all
people is the true manifestation of the Holy Spirit's indwelling.
The initial evidence of the baptism with the Holy Spirit is not
talking in a language unfamiliar to us. The true evidence is the
flow of divine love to every person in the earth. Jesus did not
say, "A new commandment I give unto you, that ye speak in an
unknown language." He said: "...That ye love one another as I
have loved you."
There is a gift of speaking in tongues, as Paul instructed
us in First Corinthians twelve; but it is not wise to press for
this particular gift. God administers this sacred gift to those
whom He wills. Spiritual immaturity will pursue the gifts of God,
but spiritual maturity will seek first the Kingdom of God and His
righteousness.
The glory of God was so within me and about the parsonage
that I couldn't begin to tell people about it. I sent Florence
to bring my Sunday School superintendent and his wife, Addie.
When they came into my room, I tried to tell them of the great
riches God had for all who would follow Him. "It is for you," I
would tell them. "God wants to do wonderful things!"
They didn't quite know what to do, but they knew God was
there and it was precious. Addie knelt, praying earnestly until
she was numb into the knuckles and into the toes. As she prayed
she began to reach a little of the wonder I was trying to
describe. "Oh, my dear ones!" she declared. "The presence of
God is so great just above us! I can't tell you what I sense.
If God would see fit to descend upon us, it
186 would be marvelous what He would do in this age!" She caught a
glimpse of the Spiritual Awakening God wanted to send--a true
Holy Ghost Revival to the World.
I requested Orville H. to bring a dear holiness mother to
see me. She answered him, "Orville, I am too sick to go; but I
will send some scripture." She wrote down the verse of scripture
on her daily devotional calendar: Leviticus 20:26--"And ye shall
be holy unto me: for I the Lord am holy and have severed you from
other people, that ye should be mine."
Think of that! Of all the verses from God's Word she could
have sent me, Jesus had arranged everything so precisely that
just this scripture should appear on her calendar at that date:
"...I HAVE SEVERED YOU FROM OTHER PEOPLE, THAT YE
SHOULD BE MINE." I was so thankful. I knew this scripture
to be verification from God of what He had been showing me
concerning my calling.
That very morning, this woman's daughter, Nora, had a
vision. She lived about seventeen miles away in Roll, Indiana,
and I had not seen her since she had sung for us at Oak Grove
nearly four years before. But that morning she saw me standing
before her. God spoke to her and said, "Go get your mother and
take her to see Rev. Helm."
She hurried all the way to her mother's home. "Mother," she
announced, "the Lord told me to take you to Rev. Helm."
She looked at her daughter and replied, "Why Child, he
already sent for me, but I am just not able to go."
"I will dress you and take you," Nora insisted.
"I just don't think I can make it," her mother answered.
"Yes, you can." Nora said, "because God has told me to do
it." She dressed her mother, helped her into the old car and
brought her to see me. I still marvel that the very thing God
had prompted me to work out earlier in the day, He accomplished
perfectly, giving this dear mother and me a sweet time together
in prayer. This was another encourage-
187 ment to my heart that what I was going through in my spirit was
of the Kingdom of God.
All during this time the Holy Ghost continued to fall upon
me and move through me in waves of His love. He was so precious.
About all I could do was praise God and give thanks to Jesus. In
the days when God came upon me, slayed me, worked with me, and
took out of me many things which were hindering His Spirit, I had
to die out to everything. I could not do what I wanted. I had
numerous responsibilities which seemed necessary and important,
but I could do only that which God wanted me to do.
When He took me to the river of death, I saw that nothing
mattered in this world but God's will. When I stood at the very
edge of death, I knew that nothing mattered at all but doing
God's will absolutely. Nothing else is going to last
but what God directs, what He guides, and He initiates.
Nothing!
And while God was bringing me into the depth of these
marvelous revelations concerning His Kingdom and His work in the
hearts of men, about all I could do was walk with Jesus and talk
to the birds and the flowers. It was as if I were in another
world.
God has taken us through many experiences, my friend. It is
only by His grace that we have made it, for there were many
pressures upon us--difficulties so immense that I am unable to
share them. The pressure was this: would we bend to man or
would we go with Heaven?
God will test you, dear one, to see what kind of person you
are. He knows in the first place, but He is wanting us to
discover it ourselves. Most people will not stand when they are
put to the test. Most people have carnality, evil, and iniquity
inside of them. God wants to remove that by placing us in some
difficult situations where we must submit everything to Him in
order to make it through. But very few will press on into the
struggle that God may inwardly cleanse them. Most persons will
bend to the flesh and
188 detour the path of trust, which goes right into the heart of the
battle.
But if we submit, believe God, and press on in faith, He
will cleanse the carnality and inner weakness out of us. It is
only through Jesus Christ that we can survive the battle, and we
must remain in that place of submission all the time for our
hearts to remain clear, cleansed, and undefiled.
On the third morning that this precious handmaid had prayed
at the altar of the church, she requested that Florence come and
pray with her. This meant that I would have to care for our
three children and see after the needs of the home. I was so in
the Spirit, however, I couldn't do anything but walk with God and
talk to Him. "Jesus," I said, "you will have to help us. I
don't know what to do but trust you."
My wife went next door to the church to join this sister in
prayer. (Years later this woman told us, "When Florence came
into the church that morning, she looked like an angel to me."
It was so important that she go to pray with her.) But how was I
going to take care of our three children? Who was going to
prepare the meals? How would I pay the light bill? I had no
answer, I was just simply trusting Jesus to work out the
situation.
Seated in a wicker chair outside on the porch at eight-
thirty that morning. I looked up, and who should be driving
around the corner towards the parsonage but Rebecca Pumphrey. As
soon as I saw her I started rejoicing.
Rebecca stopped the car in front, came up through the yard
with their little daughter, Barbara, in hand, and asked "Oh, Rev.
Helm, do you need me? I'm not accustomed to the voice of God. I
got up early this morning at six o'clock to wash our clothes, and
I put a bucket of water in the tub to heat when God said, `Go to
the Helm's.' I put another bucket in, and the Lord would say,
`Go to Helm's.' The devil would say, `Don't go. You have been
over there every night for two weeks and have worn out your
welcome.'"
189 As she told me I was happy. I was saying, "Praise the
Lord!"
She continued, "You know, each time I put a bucket of water
in the tub, the Lord said, `Go to Helm's.' Finally I got Homer
up and I said, `Homer, pray with me because I am not accustomed
to the voice of Jesus, and I think He is telling me to go over to
Florence and Loran's.' He felt I should come over. I had to
come. Do you need me, Brother Helm?"
I looked down at her with deep gratitude in my heart and
said, "Rebecca, if ever a servant of God needed assistance, we
surely need you today!"
God had told her to come just as she was, in her work dress.
He knew that she was needed to look after our children. She was
going to prepare the meals, purchase a few groceries, and drive
in to pay the light bill. How very badly she was needed, and
what a great help she was that day, no one will ever know.
The following day I was seated in the dining room looking
out the window when I saw a tree--a beautiful cherry tree. It
was round like the earth, and had fruits all over it just
beginning to turn red. It was an early spring, way ahead of most
springs that I can remember. I had never seen this tree so amply
covered with fruit before, nor did I see it so afterwards.
I was lifted to a realm of a vision as I spoke out of my
heart, "Jesus, that cherry tree is like the earth. As this tree
rests on its trunk, the earth spins about its own axis. Oh
Jesus," I cried, "all these cherries are nearly developed fruits
all over the earth. I can see them."
And He said to me, "Yes, that tree is like the earth. And
as the cherries cover the whole tree, my Spirit covers the
earth."
"But, " I asked, "If your Spirit so richly covers the earth,
why are men such spiritual skeletons? Your Spirit is so
plentiful and abundant, yet we are starved."
190 That very second, a live dove flew into the middle of that
tree. At the same instant, God spoke within me: "BY ME, THE
HOLY GHOST, THEY WILL BE FED. ONLY BY ME, THE HOLY
GHOST, CAN THEY BE FED." Then another dove fluttered into
the tree beside its mate. God again spoke within me: "BY ME,
THE HOLY GHOST, THEY WILL BE FED. THEY CAN ONLY BECOME
SPIRITUAL, AS I, THE SPIRIT, FEED THEM."
He was revealing to my heart that you and I cannot do
anything without the leadership of the Holy Spirit.
Unless God begins something by His Holy Spirit, our labor cannot
bring life to it. He was trying to help me see that His
guidance, His leadership, His will was supreme above
all our finest goals or fondest hopes. --"BY ME, THE HOLY GHOST,
THEY WILL BE FED. ONLY BY ME, THE HOLY GHOST, CAN THEY
BE FED."
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